Asher’s Birth Story
It was June 30, one day before my estimated due date. I had done my best to not think about the “estimated due date” since I had learned that they are just that – estimated. My first baby came 9 days “early” and my second came 2 weeks “late”. So I had been telling people that this baby was due “in July” - being purposely vague.
So, back to June 30, I was talking to my brother and I jokingly said, “So, my first baby was early, my second was late. Maybe this one will be right on time!”
That night, around 11:00, my water broke, a new experience for me since my water hadn’t broke with my last two until transition. I woke Travis and we called my midwife, who lives in Vegas. We wanted to give her plenty of heads up so she could make it in time! Since my contractions were still pretty irregular, she told me to get some rest and call when they were closer together.
After an hour or so, we were too restless to sleep so we got up and called everyone. My Grandma Vickie happened to be spending the night that night, so we only had to call my mom, Travis’s parents, and Grandma Pat to let them know they should plan on coming up soon. I was doing my best to relax during my contractions, rocking back and forth on my exercise ball.
Marty and Sheila (Travis’s parents) were the first to arrive, and then around 4, my midwife came in. By that time, labor was getting more intense. They got to setting up the birth tub right away. It was a huge inflatable tub with perfectly placed handle bars. I was ready to get into the tub, but my midwife wanted me to wait until I was in active labor. The contractions were coming strong and close and I thought surely I was ready! When she checked dilation, however, I was only at a 4! She calmly told me not to worry – she had dealt with a similar situation before. She could tell by looking at my belly that the baby was sticking way out and may not be positioned well to put adequate pressure on the cervix to encourage dilation. So we took my maternity belt which I normally wore underneath my bulging belly to help support it, and wrapped it right over the biggest part of my abdomen, to push the baby into a better position. Then she had me sit slightly reclined in my comfy chair.
This position was completely counter-intuitive for me. It was not comfortable, but I trusted that she knew what she was talking about. And, as time proved, she did! The contractions immediately got more intense and more productive. Within an hour, I knew I was ready to get in the tub – she didn’t even have to check dilation! Again, she suggested I recline in the tub, though I wanted to get on all fours. I was so ready to get the baby out, I took her word that this position would help me progress more quickly.
By this time, everyone was at our home – my mom and Grandma Vickie, Travis’s parents, and his Grandma Pat and Aunt Liz. Also, Malachi and Morgan were home. I was not opposed to them being in the room during the birth, however, I assumed they would not want to be. We had enough people around that I knew someone would be able to take care of them if they wanted to leave the room. When my labor began to get intense, I intuitively began to moan with the contractions – it helped me to relax and to keep my jaw loose (when your jaw is loose, it’s easier to relax the rest of your body!). This noise made the boys a little concerned, but everyone else was so relaxed and handled it so well. They assumed that if no one else was worried, they didn’t need to be. When Malachi asked if I was OK, they told him, “Mama’s just working really hard to get the baby out!”
After being in the tub only a short time, I knew that the moment of truth had finally arrived. You see, you can often tell that the birth of the baby is eminent based on the emotions of the mother. When she begins to believe she can’t do it any more and wants to give up, the end is usually in sight! So, as I began to feel overwhelmed, and as I thought to myself that maybe an epidural really wouldn’t be such a bad thing (by this time, if I was in a hospital, it would be too late for one anyway. Even if it wasn’t I know myself well enough to know I wouldn’t let anyone near me with a needle!) I immediately knew that soon, I’d be holding my baby boy. I remember looking over at my cozy bed thinking that in a short time, I’d be lying there with a new little person I’d never seen before, but whom I already knew in a very incredible way.
I asked my midwife if I should push, and she just told me that my body would let me know when it was time. At my last homebirth, I received a bit more coaching from my midwife during this phase of labor, which I think I needed. But I am thankful that this time I was encouraged to respond to my body’s prompting. It’s an incredible feeling to have the confidence that God has created your body to accomplish such a task with little outside direction.
I felt a low groan coming from my throat, and I knew it was time. Uncontrollable urges to push flooded my body. Travis got in a position to catch the baby. As Asher’s head emerged, Malachi asked it he could touch it! Grammy Jamie lifted him over the edge of the pool to touch the soft head - to this day he hasn’t stopped rubbing that baby’s head! One more push and I was holding my sweet little Asher in my arms.
Nine months of pregnancy, ten hours of labor, one precious life. He is worth every moment.
